This is that rare cultural artifact – a book so novel and ground-breaking in its realm of enquiry, that suddenly at a stroke it opens up and makes it possible to survey an entire realm of human experience hitherto unexamined… and what a realm it is: the crucible of male puberty and the deep and lasting imprint this turbulent, confusing and saturated time leaves on the sexual development of men as we journey onwards through life. To the extent that these formative experiences remain opaque and invisible to men – as they do, they inhibit true engagement not only with our sexuality, but also our innate vitality, agency, and individuation in the world.

The author seems uniquely placed to have undertaken this excavation, being steeped not only in an understanding of the biological, psychological and cultural determinants of how we are shaped, but also in an integral framework that sees reclaiming our bodyminds and whole sexual selves as part of our potential to evolve as spiritual beings.

As a clinical psychologist with many years of experience in working with men and their struggles around their emotional and sexual patterning, I have been dimly aware that some important pieces of the puzzle are missing… This book shines a powerful light on these blind spots, what has been held in shadow – the ways men have coped with this particular vulnerability that is a fundamental part of our inheritance… and how because of the confluence of overwhelm, shame, secrecy, woundings, defences and the imperative to forget, for most men it is never thought about again…

It clearly takes someone with courageous and penetrating vision to peer through the veil. I am sure that the men (and the women in their lives) who read this book – a profound and compassionate guide and companion, challenging primer and practical workbook for sexual exploration – will share my deepest gratitude that it has been written.

Justin S

Clinical Psychologist